Anyways, Chris and I spoke on the phone for like 3 hours, I was so upset and disapointed, at first because I didn't understand what it all meant, then because we were talking about our relationship and he said that he now believed that we "might" be in a relationship that could last the long run. I think we have different syntax, because really I think he means all good things, but it just sounds so awful. I wish he could find ways to talk to me about his concerns or where he feels unsure about our relationship without making it sound like it's inherently doomed.
Today went a little better. Did office work in the morning, then went to a Faculty of Science lunch for grad student award winners. It was quite nice, and I think I did a good job of promoting conversation. On the way back to the office, I stopped by Chris' lab and tried to clear thing out because I really wasn't sure if there was even a problem between us - afterall he IS ready to live in the same house as me... that's a GOOD thing, it was just shrowded in so much confusion and miscommunication about relationships that it got lost. Anyhow, I think I'd like to sit down and talk with him some more about it...
Went to see the house anyways today, it was pretty great actually. I'd love to move there if I could have a shorter lease (not the 16 months they were suggesting) and could start only in September. The ideal housemate would be Greg and Chris - Greg would be good fun and someone who's not office/school related, and I get pissed off with boy a whole lot less than I get pissed off at girls. Chris, of course, would be great because, well I love him. Anyways, we'll see what happens over the summer - Greg was thinking of getting a house and renting parts of it out... that would work well too... Dunno. Really want to fix all of this.
posted by traxis @ 6:51 p.m.
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